Separation Anxiety

Who has it? Is you you? Or your child? I ask because I have felt it- as my youngest climbed up the stairs on her big girl bus to leave for kindergarten- my heart broke a little and I wanted to climb right up there with her…and pull her back off the bus and keep her with me!
We hate to see our babies sad. And nothing pulls at our heartstrings more than when we are already stressed about leaving them- and they cry and cling and say they want to go home.
And really? Do you REALLY believe the teacher when she says that as soon as you leave they are fine? Because you should. Because they are. My recommendations for separation anxiety are these:
1. When you pick them up, give them a big hug and kiss and ask them all sorts of questions about what they did today. Show lots of enthusiasm about the classroom, the teacher, the other kids, and what they did today. Tell them you can’t wait to see what they do tomorrow.
2. When you drop them off- give them a quick hug and a kiss and say bye. Don’t delay and help them take off their shoes, coats, hang up their bags etc- they can do all that themselves. Don’t show them that they aren’t the only ones feeling anxiety- if they see it in you, they will feel it tenfold.
3. Do a quick checkin with the teacher at pickup to see how it went- but try and do it without your little one noticing or hearing.
4. Trust that the person you have chosen to care for and teach your child for the class time- is a good choice. They have probably had years of experience with separation anxiety and will deal with it. If it becomes something they can’t handle, they will let you know.
5. Relax and remember that growing up is an amazing thing- full of wonder and surprises and beauty. Its a little bit sad for us, but so lovely to watch.

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